Review: Parenting - Illustrated with Crappy Pictures, by Amber Dusick

Okay, here's what you need to do: as soon as you have acquired a copy of this book,

 

 

gather all your friends, coworkers, family members, etc., into a group, and start taking turns reading it out loud.

 

You will need to take turns, because every few pages, you will be so consumed by hysterical laughter, your eyes will be tearing up*, and you will be choking on your words, making it impossible to continue coherently. (*have at least one box of tissues handy)

 

You should probably make those all female friends/coworkers/etc., because however enlightened a guy may pretend to be, he probably does not want to hear the words, "increasingly extendable nipples". Men may have an intellectual understanding of the changes childbearing brings to a woman's body, but they won't get much of the first part of this book. They may also be mildly offended by the (Not) Sleeping section (truth hurts?)

 

You will want to read this in a group setting simply for the sake of saving time. We got this here at the library, and I had my name on the card to read it first (librarian perks!) I checked it out, brought it back to my desk, and - big mistake - flipped it open to read the introduction.

 

Which I ended up reading aloud to the clerk next to me.

 

Along with most of the first chapter.

 

Then, I took it to the lounge on my lunch break, and never ended up actually eating anything. I kept bounding out of my seat to find the nearest staff member to read the next few sentences out loud to. It was with superhuman restraint that I finally decided to let them do some of their actual work, but I don't know if they could concentrate much with me cackling like a crazy-woman in the next room.

 

So, see, it makes a lot more sense to just close the doors for the day, put up a sign saying you are conducting training in growth and development or something, and have a good old readathon.

 

Do I really need to state that this book is hiLARious? If you don't believe me, go check out Dusick's blog, at crappypictures.com. See if you don't, at least once every post, say, "OMG, Yes!!!" or, "That is SO <insert name of offspring/spouse>!" Make sure you are not in a public venue, btw, because snorting can be less than attractive.

 

Then, go get the book! Unless you live here, and you want to check it out at the library, because you can't - I got it first! Bwahaha!